Say what you like, but i could really say that's NOT truth

A somewhat late update.
As usually I've been busy practicing and promoting Orion every day.
The photos were done for an article in Street Jack.

I successfully finished my gesture training the other day.
The sword practice is also coming to an end.

The day before yesterday the other starring actors and I wore the actual outfits, hairpieces and make-up and conducted a sword fight as a camera test and did a scenario reading.

Nothing went as planned that day and I lost the little self-confidence I already had.
I clearly became aware of the difficulties of a historical play.
I felt so miserable when seeing the degree of my incapability,
how many times I kept on appearing in movies without any concerns and
how much I have seemed to deny my life as an actress so far.


It's my first time, so I didn't know. Or..
I haven't done it yet, so I can't be good. And so on..
You are working for the wage you get,
so such cheap excuses shouldn't be used and I won't either.

I still thought that it's strange,
there was so much time, so why wasn't I able to put more effort in it?
Up to now I wasn't really thinking about the huge importance, the gestures and the sword fight have for the actual play and the people who are making it, I guess.

I realized that there still a lot of things I have to do.
I embarrassed myself during the camera test,
but I'd like to use this disgrace as a motivation.
I should rather be happy that
I was able to experience this disgrace
and that I suffered by those problems.
Because I think that I'm still growing through those kind of situations.
Basically I'm glad for that we had this camera test and it means that
there's still plenty room for improvement.
I'm glad that we didn't went straight to the filming without me becoming aware of that.
There are still about 10 days left and I would like to use that time to study absolutely every little detail about historical plays.


Yesterday I bought the DVDs of Sean Penn's "Into the Wild",
which I always wanted to see, and "snatch" and "Lock Stock & Two Smoking Barrels"
from my favorite director Guy Ritchie, but I'll be putting them aside for now...
The historical play comes first.

By the way, a few days ago I cooked for myself after I don't know how many years and Jill (her pet male cat) came too close to the saucepan and burned a little bit of his whiskers.
Sorry, Jill...

Written by: jyoyu.blogspot.com
Please don't post this translation anywhere else!